TITLE: Some Days You Eat The Bear BLURB: A generic TTR/TDF episode. BASED ON: Doctor Who TYPE: Humor; "To Die For" series; 384 words. AUTHOR: Eric Adcock DATE: April 2000 ARCHIVE: http://echoalpha.com/fanfic/ Doctor Who (c) BBC. "This Time Round" concept by Tyler Dion et. al. "To Die For" concept by Erin B. Tumilty et. al. ----------------------------------------------------------------- The Second Doctor leaned back into This Time Round, closed the door, and motioned to Adric with a sympathetic expression. "I'm afraid it's for you, lad." Adric sighed, set his drink down, and walked to the door as the small man moved away-- rather quickly. The door was partly blocked, and Adric had to squeeze out sideways. He closed the door, moved back in front of it, and looked out. And up. He was facing several hundred cubic meters of the most evil machinery ever assembled. The only parts that weren't H. R. Giger black and gray were pulsing with blood-red light. A particularly nasty big pointy bit extended from the bulk of the machine and ended millimeters from Adric's chest. A canopy of darkened glass near the top smoothly hinged open, and Psycho Nyssa leaned forwards in the operator's seat. The machine's controls lit her manevolent expression a sickly green from below. "Meet the Zeta F6 Annihilator, swamp rat! Four point one eight quadrillion joules of crispy death! Let's see you reconstitute yourself after your subatomic particles are scattered from here to breakfast! Mwah ha ha ha ha ha! Mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" Adric sighed again, reached down sideways, and plucked a chunk of cement up from a worn place in the sidewalk. He gave it an experimental heft, then flung it towards the mad Trakenite. She gasped and crouched down, allowing the rock to smash through a small glass box in the rear wall of the operator's cabin and punch in a big red button labeled "Self Destruct." Nyssa rose and turned to see what had happened, noticed a big digital clock counting down from ten seconds, and decided that she should have got the model with the ejecting seat after all. The pulsing lights reversed direction and the machine began to tremble. Showing no interest, Adric slid over again, opened the door to its limit and squeezed back into the building. As he walked back to his drink, the tavern was silent-- except for the rapidly-building wail just outside that suddenly ended with the requisite massive explosion. The bar patrons that hadn't been flash-blinded turned to Adric, mouths agape. The young Alzarian made an empty-glass straw- sucking noise, then looked up and met the blank stares. "What!?"