TTR: Sontar-Huh? Skrang was sitting in This Time Round, relaxing between stories. He'd had a bit of trouble with deciding what to order, but Treader had mixed up an electrolyte solution popular with Discworld trolls, and Adric had connected it to his probic vent. It was interesting; similar to a standard recharge, but with a tangy aftertaste. Just then, Linx and Staal came crashing through the door. "Where is he?" Staal demanded. "Where is the soldier who has brought dishonour to the Sontaran Empire?" Skrang jumped up. "General Staal! I assure you..." "Silence!" Skrang shut up. "Linx," Staal ordered, "read the offending passage from 'Room 308: Revolutions'." Lynx took a peice of paper from his armour and intoned: "Even so, he found himself studying that expression. The way the eyes narrowed in instinctive readiness to shield themselves for combat. The nostrils flaring open to improve oxygen intake and maximize physical capabilities. Jaws clenched to protect the teeth from jarring impacts. Shoulders taut in preparation to spring and strike, pushing out the chest and mammary glands slightly to aid battle-readiness in some way that he hadn't figured out yet." "Sir! As you can see clearly from that passage, my interest in Elaine Mueller is purely to capture her for the glory of the Sontaran Empire." Being rather more self-aware Outside, Skrang hoped it was more convincing to them than it was to him. "We care not about your interest in the human female!" Linx retorted. "It's disgusting, but were that our concern we'd have spoken to you in- story. No, our complaint with you is far more metafictional!" Staal moved closer. "How can any true Sontaran refer to a human female's chest and fail to use the 'thorax' gag?" This Time Round created by Tyler Dion Skrang and Room 308 created by BK Willis Other Sontarans property of the BBC -- Dave So I looked, and behold, a pale horse. And the name of him who sat on it was Death. And the name of the horse was Binky. |