| Act 5 | Contents |
"Do you think the story's over yet?" Victoria asked.
Zoë paused the holovid. The handsome, athletic, dark-haired pirate captain froze in the very act of parrying a vicious blow from his opponent.
"I don't know," she said. "Why?"
"Well, if it is, we should go and make sure Jamie's all right."
"He'll be fine," Isobel said. "Now do be quiet. I want to see the rest of this."
Victoria hesitated, obviously torn between her vague fears of trouble for Jamie and the very visible hologram of a swashbuckling hero in direst peril.
"At least let's watch the next little bit," Isobel suggested. "Then we can see how Captain Clegg manages to escape."
"I suppose a few more minutes won't hurt," Victoria conceded.
"That's more like it. Carry on, Zoë."
Zoë resumed the playback. The three watchers leaned forward eagerly; within seconds, adventure, romance and derring-do on the high seas had driven all thought of Jamie from their minds.
- * -
In a world of freezing blue-violet mist, the dark reaper held out his hand.
YOUR CARD, PLEASE, MS. KINGDOM.
"Here you are," Sara said.
THANK YOU.
There was a tiny click of metal against metal, and the card was handed back to her with a new hole in it.
AND YOUR COLLEAGUE?
"He doesn't have one yet."
I SHALL ISSUE ONE WITHOUT DELAY. The cloaked and hooded figure turned to Steven. FOR DATA PROTECTION PURPOSES I AM OBLIGED TO INFORM YOU—
"Just before you start," Steven said. "Where's the other fellow? He was in the castle with us. You're not telling me he survived?"
HE DID NOT. BUT HE IS NOT HANDLED BY MY DEPARTMENT.
"So who does get to deal with him, then?"
TIME, said Death, with an air of even more finality than usual. LET US RESUME. FOR DATA PROTECTION PURPOSES...
- * -
To Sam Tyler, being killed and finding himself in the past was becoming something of a habit. He scrambled to his feet and looked down. Sandals. Some kind of leather kilt. A gladius. Armour. Cool metal — presumably a helmet — was enclosing his head. There was a ringing in his ears, which sounded horribly like David Bowie singing "What kind of fool am I?"
He looked around. Mosaic floor. Painted walls. Couches. Statues. Urns.
"Oh, great," he muttered to himself. "What year's this supposed to be? And what's the betting I'll still be working for some loud-mouthed self-opinionated homophobic maniac?"
"Quinctilius Varus!" Augustus Caesar's voice boomed from behind him. "WHERE ARE MY EAGLES?"
- * -
"I am not serving you two any more," Katarina said firmly. "House rules."
"Come on, then, Superintendent," Inspector Pascoe said. "She's right, you know. You've had quite enough already."
Superintendent Dalziel staggered to his feet. "Gimme a hand, then."
Pascoe took one of his arms. Katarina moved reluctantly to support the other.
"Allow me, miss." Will Shakespeare darted in and took her place at Dalziel's side. While he and Pascoe guided the overweight Superintendent into the car park, Katarina took Michelle to one side and engaged her in conversation.
Not long after Shakespeare had returned to his own seat, Katarina approached him.
"I wanted to thank you for your help," she said. "It is not always so easy to rid ourselves of undesirables."
"Think nothing of it, love. Who were they?"
"That is another mystery. Polly seemed to think they were Harvey and Len, but anyone can see they are not. I cannot tell what has got into her at the moment." She shook her head. "Some days I do not know whether I am coming or going."
"Why not sit down for a bit and have a drink?"
"Not while I am on duty." Katarina turned to go.
"Perhaps afterwards, then?"
Katarina turned back and smiled at him. "Perhaps."
- * -
There was a brief hum in the air, and suddenly Samantha and Jamie, instead of facing an infuriated Izzy, were back in the T-Mat booth at the substation.
"Gia!" Jamie stepped out of the cubicle. "You've saved us in the nick of time."
Gia, her usual efficient self, nodded.
"Why have all your clothes gone green?" she asked, her hands darting swiftly across the control board as she shut the system down.
"Izzy was gonna turn us into frogs," Samantha explained. "You rescued us before the spell took hold."
Gia pulled a face. "Actually, on second thoughts, I was better off not knowing. The 'nick of time', you say?"
Jamie and Samantha both nodded.
"Then it sounds as if you two owe me a big favour."
"Just name your favour, and it will be done," said Samantha.
"We won't forget the service that you did," Jamie added.
Jamie looked at Samantha. Samantha looked at Jamie.
"You realise that we're speaking in blank verse?" she said.
Jamie stared helplessly back. "I canna stop, however hard I try..."
I cannot hope to name each single work
That I have touched on in this Story Time.
But here are those whose influence extends
Beyond a passing reference or two:
'Macbeth', of course, was written by the Bard.
The BBC created 'Doctor Who'
And 'Life on Mars', from whence Sam Tyler comes.
The Boffo shop's from Terry Pratchett's books.
Sam Carter is from 'Stargate SG-1',
While Horace Carter Hovey really lived
And did indeed explore Colossal Cave.
Wiz Zumwalt was created by Rick Cook.
The Round is Tyler Dion's. For the creche,
Credit must rest with Imran Inayat.
To BKWillis, props for Story Time,
Zack, Carter's Imports, and of course François.
My thanks to those who recently discussed
Their own ideas for Nameless in this group,
Or took the time to comment on this tale.
Some credit, too, is due to Vicky J
Who sulked until I said I'd do this play.
| Act 5 | Contents |